Jynx

The lips are the first thing you notice: enormous, a shade of pink found nowhere else on its body, set against a purple face and beneath blonde hair that falls to its waist. What looks like a red dress is not clothing that can be removed. At 1.4 metres and 40.6 kilograms, it has the size and silhouette of an adult human, which is where its official category, Human Shape Pokémon, comes from.

The resemblance goes beyond its figure. Pokédex entries insist on two things: the way it moves and the way it sounds. It walks with a sway, thrusting out its hips, to a rhythm that seems to have been invented by Jynx itself, and that strut draws in anyone watching it—some entries flatly say that no one can resist copying it. Alolan specimens are said to be the most captivating at this.

The other thing is its voice. It produces cries reminiscent of human speech, so much so that people are still trying to decipher what it says, and some composers have written pieces specifically for these Pokémon. The entire species is female. It appears in urban areas and closes a two-stage evolutionary line that starts with Smoochum.

Its stat spread is the textbook fragile special attacker: 115 Special Attack and 95 Speed on one side, 35 Defense and 65 HP on the other. The 95 Special Defense is only mildly misleading, because with that HP it can take one neutral special hit and not much else. That adds up to 455 points.

What drags the whole package down is its defensive typing. Ice and Psychic combine for six weaknesses—Fire, Rock, Steel, Bug, Ghost and Dark—and only keep Ice, Psychic and Fighting at bay. Offensively, things improve: Blizzard, learned at level 58, and Ice Beam by TM cover Dragon, Ground, Flying and Grass, while Psychic, at level 34, punishes Poison and Fighting.

Of its three Abilities, Forewarn is the only one with any real use: it reveals the opponent’s most powerful move before it is used, which helps you decide whether to stay in or switch out. Oblivious blocks Attract and Taunt. Dry Skin, its Hidden Ability, is a problem: it loses HP in hot weather and only recovers it with water.

Beyond that, it performs well in a normal playthrough. With 115 Special Attack, it needs no items or setup to sweep entire routes, and TM Nasty Plot doubles down if it survives a turn. It also gets the Mean Look and Perish Song combination, at levels 46 and 52 respectively, which traps the opponent and starts a three-turn countdown; it is slow, it is cheesy, and it works against the AI. What it cannot forgive is any decent physical Dark- or Steel-type hit against that 35 Defense.

It belongs to a single Egg Group, Human-Like, and its gender ratio leaves no room for debate: 100% of all specimens are female. That does not stop you breeding it; it only means pairing it with a Ditto or any male from the same group—Mr. Mime and company will do—and the egg will always hatch into Smoochum.

It takes 25 incubation cycles, roughly 6630 steps, putting it among the Pokédex’s longer hatching times. Smoochum evolves by levelling up to level 30, with no item, friendship or time of day involved. It grows at a medium pace and gives 2 Special Attack EVs when defeated, a figure that matches its best stat.

Its habitat is urban, an odd trait for an Ice-type Pokémon, and its catch rate is 45: the range occupied by Pokémon that expect you to weaken them first and throw several Balls. Wild specimens sometimes carry an Aspear Berry. Its base friendship, 70, is standard.